Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas!!

This year Christmas has been a little difficult. My aunt has been sick for quite some time and we are getting to the end of her illness now :( My husband and I went to see her early last week and I'm SO thankful we did because that was the last time I was able to talk to her and hear her voice :( She is an amazing lady. She has fought and dealt with more in her life than anyone I have EVER known.  She is smart, funny, quirky and I just loved her to death! I've struggled to get into the spirit the last few weeks due to focusing my thoughts on sadness. Today I had a talk with myself and reminded myself that Christmas has always been her favorite holiday of the year. She decorated her entire house, even the bathroom! (LOL) She is currently in a coma, but today I tried to think about all the years she's lived and all the years of Christmas that she has enjoyed.  Today was a little different than previous years, but after telling myself that I needed to enjoy today FOR HER it was better than I had anticipated.  Sadly there won't be any more Christmas celebrations with my aunt or anymore times of laughter listening to her stories. Even though I know the sadness is going to get worse I'm choosing to TRY and focus on how she lived life. She lived in pain every day of her life, but 99.9% of the time you wouldn't have known it. Hopefully we have all gotten enough of her spirit to help us through these difficult times that are coming. I love my Aunt Mary Lou with all my heart! The time I spent with my husband and children today is special and I'm celebrating those good times because I know she would want me to.